ASTOUNDING NEWS

Before I get sidetracked, as I usually do, let me just share a little gem of information with you:  MILWAUKEE is in WISCONSIN!  All these years I had Fonzie living in Idaho.

I feel totally horrid today, so horrid infact that at quarter to two in the afternoon I still am not dressed. Back hurts, chest hurts , I spent last night barking like a dog.   In fact while we're on with dog analogies May I just say I feel ruff!  More paracetamols, that's what I need.

 

BANISHED!

I've been banished to the bedroom!  Funny that since it was only a couple of hours ago that I was urged to get up.  There are strange bangings and clatterings going on in the living room.  Well I'M not looking!  Today's the day our new fireplace is being fitted (not by Keith) and I have dreadful visions of the chimney - a big tall one at the end of the roof - crashing to the ground and the chimney breast in the living room caving in.  I've got such a disaster movie going on in my head.

A cup of tea has just been set on my desk.  Did I detect Keith hopping from one foot to the other?  Don't be daft Ang, the old fireplace is out already.  That was a bit quick.  Has he done it properly?  The disaster movie has now cut to panning around the 2" layer of soot covering our living room.  I can smell soot, I'm sure I can.

Keith just came back in here. leaving the door open.  That must mean there's bad news and I should watch what I say in case the fitter hears me.  "Fitting will cost a little bit more because he has  to cut out a couple of inches all round to make the hole the right size AND remove a back boiler."  A BACK BOILER???  I didn't know there was one of them.  Did you know that?   Just how old is that fire, I'm wondering.  Maybe we should have put it on Antiques Roadshow.

I can hear drilling or something.  No, it'll be a brick saw....and I picture another few months of getting rid of brick dust from everywhere.  Whatever happened to using a bolster and lump hammer to carefully remove brickwork not needed?

That amaryllis I mentioned last time is blooming beautiful!  It has 3 trumpets fully out and a fourth on the way.  My sis started hers growing at the same time and the stem is still only an inch long.  She says she's chucking it out
but I think it'll go if she lets it.   Just look at MINE (she said smugly):

Remember that lovely Kelloggs brekky basket I won in Marie's giveaway last year?  Red. shiney teapot?  This is that teapot today:

I loved that teapot.   Poured beautifully, never dripped.  And now look at it.  It's all Keith's fault.  I can never use it for tea again.  I wonder if I could grow herbs in it.  What does bergamot look like?  That's what gives Earl Grey its distinctive flavour isn't it?  Might look nice growing in it and out of the spout (as was).

They've gone.  Obviously there's still work to be done BUT The new fire looks lovely.

'Scuse me while I take advantage............

xxxxx

A few odds and ends

Well now, doesn't time fly!  My 60th Birthday arrived on 7th January, marking another milestone (or millstone, depending how you look at it) in my life.  So now I have a choice:  I can become a grumpy old woman or a sweet  little ray of sunshine.  The latter sounds nice, and perhaps something I should aspire to, but being a Grumpy sounds FUN.  You don't think?  Think of it:  I am now allowed to call all pop music "that dreadful row", I can get my eyes tested for free, Ditto for prescriptions - I can  be a drug crazed maniac for absolutely nothing.  I qualify for Sheltered Housing.  If I could only get on a bus I could go all over the place.  It is apparently possible, in theory, to travel the length and breadth of the country for not one penny piece.  Should I happen to get taken to hospital, I am likely to be put in the geriatric ward until they find out what's wrong with me.  I can start to quote Maxine.   Great!

And yet somewhere along the line I've been a bit disappointed.   Being so little I used to always be mistaken for a half-fare on the bus or train.  When did that stop happening?  When did I stop being "girl" and start being "lady"?  When did policemen stop being grey haired old codgers and start being rosy-cheeked youths with bum-fluff on their chins?  Even the senior ones!  I suppose youth must be that brief time between little plastic pants and big ones!

Thanks to everyone who sent birthday wishes;  I had a lovely weekend of celebrations but I'll have to show you some photos next time as, not only has my computer lost touch with the printer, it's not on speaking terms with the camera either!

Mimuther gave me an amaryllis last September and it has just decided to give me a flower.  It has spent the past 2 - 3 weeks growing longer......and longer......and longer and is now almost blooming on the bedroom windowsill.  It's going to be a lovely deep red..

All my sugarcraft equipment is gone.  I was sad to see the end of it but there was no point in keeping it when my silly right arm won't let me do the fiddly bits any more and my rotten balance won't let me stand up, as you need to.  So now I need a new hobby that I can do with my left hand;  something which doesn't require hundreds of pounds-worth of equipment.  I thought about creative writing.  I can do beginnings and endings but it's the bit in the middle that has me stumped.

Speaking of writing - There's a danger that I shall be banned from reading in bed.  This always happens after Christmas when people give me books.  The real danger item at the moment is called "The Wrinklies' Bedside Companion" by Mike Haskins and Clive Whichelow.  Having just become a Wrinklie myself I regard it as educational.  It is really a work-out manual for all the muscles you use to laugh with!  A word of advice:   keep a paper bag handy in case you meet yourself coming back in the laughing stakes and start hyperventilating!!!

Another chuckle-worthy tome, given me by a bloggy-pal, is "The Stanley Holloway Monologues".  I love Stanley Holloway (well, if he was alive I would).  If you're not a middle aged (or more) Brit you probably won't know them but I remember them specially on Children's Favourites on the radio in the 1950's.   You have to read them with a north-west of England accent.  But - hey - I can do all that and believe me I have the most toned-up laughing gear in the world.....who needs jogging?

Talk to you soon - sooner - soonest!!!