Wednesday, 31 December 2008

The Domino Effect!

Now look, I must be wrong here. There must be something I haven't considered; I hope there is. But it seems to me that 2008 was a B~A~D year.

My over-riding memory is of the mishap I had in July. It didn't seem much at the time but its effects are with me still and look set to remain. The wheelchair has become part of the furniture - and part of the furniture has had to be moved out to make room for it! Whereever me and it are we feel in the way. There is - or was - a BBC radio programme called "Does He Take Sugar", which was the BBC's way of trying to become more 'disability inclusive', if you know what I mean. It wasn't very good really but I am now very aware of the sentiments implied by its title. People do, indeed, tend to talk to whoever is with me rather than to me.

I have often wondered how 'Who Wants to be a Millionnaire' would manage if a wheelchair user snuk through to get on the show. You know? Those very high chairs they have which require driving-standard eyesight to see the monitors? I thought we would find out the other night when they had an Olympic and Paralympic Special but no, they didn't have any wheelchair users on!

My other all-pervading memory of the year is..........horrible weather. Up here in the north of England I don't think there was a single evening when you could sit outside with your glass of wine and enjoy the sunset. On the plus side I heard on the radio that, with all that rain, the butterfly population is likely to have been decimated. Y~A~A~A~Y!!! Sorry but, as some of you know, I hate the flappy things.

Mum had her posh cruise on the Queen Mary 2 in November. From what she said I gathered that this was all pretty sedate and - well - posh, but she is starting to tell the truth now.

Like when she and her sis, the Dynamic Duo, gatecrashed a private party to which they had not been invited. They were plied with champagne and picky bits for a couple of hours before a purser gently pointed out their error but wouldn't hear of them leaving.

Like when they decided to have a look at the art gallery on board. Some of the paintings were displayed not on the wall but standing up at a slight angle. A bit like dominoes. They sat on 2 chairs between 2 paintings. Mum accidentally whacked the nearest painting with her elbow and down went the whole lot - clunk, clunk, clunk, just like a line of dominoes! They left quickly.

If I don't publish this now - this instant minute - I'll keep on thinking of things forever. Next time I'll show you a few things that Santa brought.