Well Keith reigns triumphant again! Not just one packet of green split peas (Jasper: yes you have mistaken peas for .......... something else!) but two! That should ensure pea soup for the foreseeable! This is my Waste Not Want Not Pea Soup.
You really need to have cooked some smoked ham the day before. What I do is cover it with cold water, about 2 litres, bring it to the boil then simmer it for an hour. That done, lift it into a roasting pan, remove the skin (but leave the fat on) and roast it, uncovered, gas mark 6 for 30 minutes. Don't throw that precious water away that you boiled the ham in because the next thing you do is cook your potatoes in it - a few more than you need for eating with the ham - until they're tender. With a slotted spoon take out what you need for that meal and leave the remainder in the water. Well, stock really. When your pan of stock and potatoes is cold stick it in the fridge: that's one less pan to wash up today! Keep the beautiful remnants of smoked ham too.
Before you go to bed put about 5 ounces green split peas in a basin. Cover them with cold water, stick them in the fridge too and go get a good night's sleep.
Now, next day is SOUP DAY. Get your pan of stock and spuds out and your dish of soaked peas. Drain the peas into a colander (you can let that water go - though it might do for watering your plants if you really don't want to waste it.) and rinse them well. Tip them into the stock pan, along with a couple of cloves of garlic and a chopped onion - red in my case, there being somewhat of a glut(!) - and the lean remains of your smoked ham roast, cut tiny.
Onto the stove with it, bring it to the boil, with the lid on, then let it all simmer away merrily for about 50 minutes or so, stirring occasionally, until the peas are tender. Note that I said "Bring it to the boil", not let it boil (she said, sternly)!
OK? At this point it looks horrid. If you've got a stick blender you might like to plug it in now and use it to make this pan of mush and juice into a pan of lovely thick soup. Otherwise you.ll have to do it in batches in a food processor or a blender. If the worst comes to the worst use a potato masher to squash all the lumpy bits.
Taste it - more seasoning? Salt and pepper it to your own taste and just to be posh serve it with a swirl of cream, but you want the over-riding flavour to be the peas and smoked ham with a certain je ne sais quoi.. And if you can find any of THAT in a shop, you're a better man than I Gunga Din!
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