Tuesday, 31 August 2010

Tues 31 Aug 2010 - talking about Blackpool.........

I think I might have already printed this poem, maybe when I was with AOL.  I HOPE when I was with AOL!  As a child I used to have a book of these, which my dad gave me.  I wish I still had it.  An English actor, Stanley Holloway, famously recited them in a broad Northern English accentIf you're not English and wonder "Who the heck was Stanley Holloway?", he played Eliza Doolittle's father, the dustman, in the film of 'My Fair Lady'.  Let me tell you that was NOT a northern accent.   He was an Essex boy by birth.  Oh, I've just been told that Stanley Holloway did, in fact, become quite well-known in America.  Here's the poem:


There's a famous seaside town called Blackpool,
That's noted for fresh air and fun,
And Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom
Went there with young Albert, their son.

A grand little lad was young Albert
All dressed in his best; quite a swell
With a stick with an 'orse's 'ead 'andle
The finest that Woolworth's could sell.

They didn't think much to the Ocean
The waves, they were fiddlin' and small
There was no wrecks and nobody drownded
Fact, nothing to laugh at, at all.
So, seeking for further amusement
They paid and went into the zoo
Where they'd lions and tigers and camels
And old ale and sandwiches too.

There were one great big lion called Wallace
His nose were all covered with scars
He lay in a somnolent posture
With the side of his face on the bars.

Now Albert had heard about lions
How they was ferocious and wild
To see Wallace lying so peaceful
Well, it didn't seem right to the child.

So straight 'way the brave little feller
Not showing a morsel of fear
Took his stick with its 'orse's 'ead 'andle
And shoved it in Wallace's ear.
You could see the lion didn't like it
For giving a kind of a roll
He pulled Albert inside the cage with 'im
And swallowed the little lad 'ole

Then Pa, who had seen the occurrence
And didn't know what to do next
Said "Mother! Yon lions 'et Albert"
And Mother said "Eeee, I am vexed!"

Then Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom
Quite rightly, when all's said and done
Complained to the Animal Keeper
That the lion had eaten their son.

The keeper was quite nice about it
He said "What a nasty mishap
Are you sure it's your boy he's eaten?"
Pa said "Am I sure? There's his cap!"
The manager had to be sent for
He came and he said "What's to do?"
Pa said "Yon lion's 'et Albert
And 'im in his Sunday clothes, too."

Then Mother said, "Right's right, young feller
I think it's a shame and a sin
For a lion to go and eat Albert
And after we've paid to come in."

The manager wanted no trouble
He took out his purse right away
Saying "How much to settle the matter?"
And Pa said "What do you usually pay?"

But Mother had turned a bit awkward
When she thought where her Albert had gone
She said "No! someone's got to be summonsed"
So that was decided upon.
Then off they went to the Police Station
In front of the Magistrate chap
They told 'im what happened to Albert
And proved it by showing his cap.

The Magistrate gave his opinion
That no one was really to blame
And he said that he hoped the Ramsbottoms
Would have further sons to their name.

At that Mother got proper blazing
"And thank you, sir, kindly," said she
"What waste all our lives raising children
To feed ruddy lions? Not me!"

9 comments:

Ann in the UP said...

Vexed!!!???

Indeed. Very funny, I guess they provided some entertainment for the holiday goers at the zoo!

I'm mostly known as 'MA' said...

That's a cute one!

Andy said...

I can remember hearing Stanley Hollaway reciting that on the raddio, or should it be t'wireless.

Jan said...

Oh yes a prize winner that one ,wasnt there one about 'Sam pick up thy musket ' too ? Thanks for the memory ...love Jan xx

Rita said...

This is new for me here in Canada but I must say I truly enjoyed this one. And i do remember the dustman in my Fair Lady.
Rita

Jasper said...

Angie.

This is my dad's FAVOURITE poem! I remember seeing him perform it at his work's party when I was tiny!!! He even got an 'orses 'ead 'andle-stick for the purpose, which he has to this day on his bedroom table!! I remember the poem Jan is talking about as well - "The Sam - pick oop thy musket" one - one of the subsequent lines went "Thee dropped it; thee pick it oop..." I think my dad has the book you're talking about - shall I ask him? If so, I can probably get you a copy. A nice little Christmas present for our lovely Angie from me and Jasper-Horatio!

I think there was also a "sequel" to the 'Story of Albert and the Lion'! (I didn't let Jasper read the whole of the poem - for some reason he is afraid of Tigers and Lions. I cannot imagine why.).

Lots of love,

RE & JH xxxxx

Ben said...

That was new to me, Angie - not surprising, I suppose, since we don't hear much about Blackpool here on the other side of the big pond - and I liked it very much. Almost makes Blackpool worth the trip! (I did say almost... :-) )

Ben
http://kissthecook-ben.blogspot.com/

Grammy Staffy said...

Deaar Angie,
We are back home from our trip to Utah and I got to catch up on your blog today. I am sorry that your trip to Blackpool was not a good one. I hope that you will get some compensation back from the hotel chain. Maybe they will give you a free stay in Blackpool!!! Ha ha
This poem in too funny. I wish that I could have heard Stanley Holloway read it. He was one of my favorite characters in My Fair Lady.

I am so tired now that I am home. I am quite worthless today. Maybe I am worn out from staying up nights with the new baby..... or maybe I am just plain lazy???
Have a good week. Hugs, Lura

Marie said...

I had never heard of Stanley or this poem Angie! Thanks so much for sharing. Before I came over here I thought an English Accent was an English Accent! Boy what an education I have had!! xxoo
PS Love your accent by the way!